But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Randomize
