But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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