What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
