It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
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