so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
