She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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