i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Randomize
