yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
I am puke
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Randomize
