I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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