You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
