So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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