We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
