@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
We don't watch enough power rangers
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
