Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
