Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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