this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize
