dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize
