umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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