i think my tv is drunk
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Randomize
