she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
It's never too late to be topless.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Randomize
