that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
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