how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
