Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
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