dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize
