jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh�
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
