I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Randomize
