There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
