i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
a search helicopter?!
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
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