Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Randomize
