my room smells like sperm. sweet.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
