I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
