I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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