Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize
