his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
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