would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize
