So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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