Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Randomize
