He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
foreskin is a definite game changer
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Randomize
