shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize
