Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
