It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
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