found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
