Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Randomize
