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• (248): View more from Michigan

  yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss

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• (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Multitasking record: pooping whilst putting on shoes and cleaning ear with q-tip. All while texting.

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Update: fell off toilet, one shoe on, q-tip still in ear. Not a pro.

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs

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• (870): View more from Arkansas

  She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.

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• (707): View more from California

  We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.

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• (574): View more from Indiana

  When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE

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• (586): View more from Michigan

  Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.

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• (708): View more from Illinois

  who are you talking about my vagina to?!

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• (856): View more from New Jersey

  Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars

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• (206): View more from Washington

  Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?

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• (512): View more from Texas

  Wtf happened last night

  (1-512): View more from Texas

  You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know

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• (347): View more from New York

  She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.

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• (716): View more from New York

  I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.

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