I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
the liver wants what the liver wants
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize