i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
