Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
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