It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Also, beer. Big fan.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
