SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize