Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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